Try This If You Want To Die Fast In NIgeria

1. *When your uncle visits and give you money*
 Mom : "Bring, lemme save it for you"
 Me :

2. Soldier: Why are you wearing camouflage?

 Me: I am a citizen with the right to wear anything.

3.Me: "I don't feel like going to church today" 

Dad: 

 4.Dad: You've got to choose between keeping your hair or staying in my house 

Me:

5.Dad: Ada where are you Ada:

Dad,I'll be sleeping over at my boyfriend's ho.... 

Dad: Mama Ada,ur Daughter is dead

6. "Go and get dressed we have guest!" 

*comes downstairs like....*

#1000NigerianWaysToDie
"Go and get dressed we have guest!"
*comes downstairs like....* pic.twitter.com/iZFyjlWmrY

— NikonBrown (@onyiaka) August 28, 2016

 7. Introducing your parents to your friends by first name
"Laura, meet Lola and Dami."

 8."come wash these plates"
"why can't we just use the dish washer"

9. Naming your dog Buhari

10. when u go out with ur mum & sth is offered 2 u & she stylishly winks at u not 2 eat but u still go ahead & eat

11. Me: Mum come and see this picture on my phone Mum:
*starts scrolling through your gallery*

12.You argue with your parents and you say: "It's not your fault."

 13.When your parents friend visits & you don't disappear from the living room.

14. *sends nude photos to number called "Daddy"
              instead of "Sexy Daddy"*

15. You don't receive any award during your school's speech-and-prize giving day

16. Son: Fuck you.
           Dad: what did you say?

17. when you mistakenly send nudes meant for your boyfriend to your mom

18. when your mother invites your two wicked uncle to flog you

19.Dad: *calls me 3times*.
        How many times did i call u? Me: ah ah didn't u do 1,2,3 in skul?

20. Mom~ Whose that in ur bedroom? Me~ My girlfriend

Culled from twitter feeds

17:47:00